Ruby, Ruby, Ruby, Ruby....

Only one week to go until the biggest gambling week of the year, which this year will have an extra added bonus. On 12th March, Prestbury Park in Cheltenham will come alive as 100,000+ punters flock to the mecca of jumps racing. My ticket for Gold Cup day has been purchased, and there will not be a more lively person on the 6.28 train to Manchester next Friday morning (Don't ask, Yates booked the tickets). In addition, the 'carnival of cricket' starts on the same day. The cricket World Cup also gets underway on the 12th, with the West Indies hosting Pakistan. All five days of the week have been booked off work to watch the action at home, in the pub or at the course.

My major problem at the moment is not what to back, but how to get the funds to punt on the nags. My employers made a total cock-up with my latest payslip, and as a result I have only been paid as much as a Hungarian goulash factory worker. In addition, the TV licence has just been direct-debited out of my bank account to the tune of £131. Quite how the BBC justify this is beyond me. The only thing I have watched on the Beeb in the last two weeks was the first 5 minutes of Reading v Man U. It's all very well my hundred quid keeping Motty in sausage rolls for the next year, but what about when I need to shove a ton on McCoy in the first?

In order to get in the mood for the festival, I have composed a top 10 tracks to be played at repeat on my I-Pod:-

1. Here's Where The Story Ends (Tin Tin Out) - This came out in March 1998 and I heard it played on the radio throughout the festival of that year. I bring the track out at this time every year for some daft reason.

2. In Da Club (50 Cent) - Reminds me of Cheltenham 2003, as the first time I heard the song in full was in a pole dancing club in Cheltenham on Champion Hurdle day 2003, sipping Smirnoff Black Ice (classy).

3. Chemistry (Semisonic) - Reminds me of Crossy's crazy dancing in Chemistry nightclub. "Ooo..oooh.. It's all about Chemistry..."

4. Mr Brightside (Killers) - St Patricks Day 2005 was the first time I heard this tune. Dancing in Gallery with those crazy Guinness hats on that we had to smuggle in.

5. Acquiesce (Oasis) - This song summarises the friendship and camaraderie so prevalent at the Cheltenham track in Gold Cup week. Everyone seems to get on with each other. Apart from when Yates nearly had his pocket pinched by a pikey in the (now defunct) Springbok bar in '03. I loved that bar..... leads on to....

6. Listen Up (Oasis) - Another great track from the B-sides album. This always gets a good sing- song going when put on the juke box.

7. The Wild Rover (various) - Reminds me of my fifty pint Guinness drinking challenge last festival. A great Irish drinking song.

8. Glamorous (Fergie) - "If you ain't got no money take your broke ass home...." Probably me at the end of the week. Or the start if things don't pan out well :-(

9. Ruby (Kaiser Chiefs) - "Ruby, Ruby, Ruby, Ruby......." (pictured).

10. erm... anyone for 'Easy Lover'? Karlos?